It's clear that many people who read my blog have different political opinions than I do. Many, particularly, seem to be opposed to abortion. Because I've been so public about having a dilation and extraction (or a "partial-birth abortion"), I've had some amazing conversations (not counting Holly). I’ve been having a fascinating email discussion with a woman who is staunchly opposed to abortion, but who’s mind I’ve opened with my story. As she put it, “I believe abortion is taking a human life, but I’m damned if I know who I think should be arrested if it were ever made illegal.”
I was not quite five years old when abortion became legal. Even at that tender age, I’d already been to pro-choice marches with my mother. I have always felt, deep in my heart, that it is critical for abortions to be available to women, primarily because women must be allowed to control their own reproductive capabilities. While I believe that mothering is a critical and culturally important job (and an influential one), if women want to have a voice in business or politics they MUST be able to choose when and how often they have children.
Women, I also feel strongly, must to be allowed to express and enjoy their sexuality. Lords knows that men have always been able to! That means, of course, that women should always have free and unfettered access to contraception (something many anti-choice people are opposed to—which I simply don’t get).
When I was in high school, I volunteered at my local birth control clinic (wasn’t I a cute little feminist!). The clinic was full of stories of fathers bursting in, demanding to know if we had provided contraception to their daughters, or boyfriends and husbands wanting to know if their wives had been in to get pregnancy tests. Thankfully, of course, the law prohibited anyone in the clinic from answering those questions. I’d even heard a story of a father finding his daughter and dragging her out by her hair.
Unlike those of us who desperately want a child, there are women that see that second pink line on a test and are filled with dismay and fear. Women who already have more children then they can support or women too young to be good at mothering. Many of these are women simply cannot, for their own safety, tell their sexual partners or parents.
Remember that the number one cause of death in pregnant women is murder. And while the Laci Peterson case got a great deal of attention (and some questionable laws passed), most of these murders occur much earlier in the pregnancy.
This is why I believe that in cases of both contraception and abortion parental and spousal/partner are unacceptable. If it’s lives we are trying to value, the life of the woman (even if she's a teenager) must be on that list! As for legally required waiting periods, they really aren’t necessary. If you go to Planned Parenthood and get a positive pregnancy test, it’s not like they have a room in the back ready and waiting and you can just stand up and say, “Time to get that abortion!” Women usually wait for a second test and an exam, and then it has to be scheduled. There is plenty of time to really think about it without it being legally mandated.
One of the issues I have with the anti-choice movement is that there is this belief that women make the decision to have an abortion lightly. I know plenty of women that have had them, and every single one agonized over the choice. Of all the women I know that have received abortions, there is only perhaps one who I feel made that choice out of selfishness. One. Out of at least fifty.
Remember, too, that when a woman has a positive pregnancy test at a place like Planned Parenthood, she receives counseling. Contrary to anti-choice opinion, she is not forced to have an abortion. She is told about abortion, true, but she’s also informed about adoption as well as the resources and support available to her if she chooses to parent. Planned Parenthood provides prenatal care too, remember—to nearly 16,000 women in 2002. Not to mention doing over a million breast exams a year (think about that next time you want to block the entrance to a clinic). It’s also worth noting that 70% of Planned Parenthood’s clients are over 150% below the federal poverty level. For a chart about the variety of services provided by Planned Parenthood, look here.
Planned Parenthood also referred nearly 2,000 women to organizations that could help them place their babies up for adoption in 2002.
It’s easy to change people’s minds about medically necessary abortions. My situation with my sons, and Julia’s with her son Thomas , are clear and heart wrenching. The awful scenarios that forced us to terminate the life of a beloved and wanted child can sway even the hardest of anti-choice hearts.
But because the religious right is working so hard to stop those other abortions, the ones where the baby just isn’t wanted, those of us who have a medical need are the ones that pay.
Because of the anti-choice movement, doctors are no longer undergoing training on how to perform abortions. Why would they, when they could be murdered as a result? My doctor is only one of two in my major east coast city that still performs dilation and extractions. Many women who end up in my or Julia’s situation don’t even have the option.
Do you see why choice must, across the board, remain available? Be pro-life. I know I am. I want to save the lives of both women and babies.
